Tag Archives: Relationships

Two Wolves!

This post was triggered by a post by a lovely lady, Pat Cegan (Pat’s Pondering – evil), and it brought back a part of my journey where spirit showed me something we all partake in. Throughout life we have many instances of doing right and wrong in a maze of our day to day lives. This can be as simple as taking a toy off another child. Mind you, you are also a child, so the uproar from the other child, smack and scolding is seriously in your face, so it is an event you take on board because of its impact on us. And like most of life, our actions have much impact around us, and by their creation (good or bad), we feel their responses in many different ways.

Give a flower to a beautiful lady and the response (usually), is at the least, a smile and some lovely words for the gift. At the opposite end of the scale is abusing someone and in response getting abused back or at the least leaving that person upset or angry. In many of these examples we see every day, are from people who are only acting from what they have been taught or are unsure in how to deal with a situation, and can sometimes overreact or give a response that ‘seems’ to be out of context with whatever has occurred.

I see these things every day and I think that there should, at the least, be a very humanistic side to the teaching of our young in schools to make sure that they at least have something in their learning to show them there is another way, even though at home may not be very comfortable. For in that space at home are the people they love and look up to, want to be so much like them, even though those same people have probably grown up with circumstances that are less than favorable for themselves and can’t help but pass on what they have learned by their parents that they loved and looked up to as well.

But each time I think of these things, I am shown another element by spirit, whereby our lives are full of these things for a reason. We live within the context of these things in our lives to show us an understanding of what holds truth within us, and by experiencing these ‘good and evil’ things we come to know our truth, that release of our fears, letting go of our expectations and finally coming to understand what unconditional love is. And it is there…I have seen and felt it…is the absence of all these things. The understanding of why we hold onto many things in our life through those fears, IS to learn the empathy, the love and beauty that it holds.

We avoid our fears for one very big reason…they scare us. Why would we stick ourselves into a situation that frightens us. For one very good reason. That avoidance builds the fear to such a degree, so that when finally faced, the emotional impact is huge. It is an incredible release of all that we have built up against it, and the impact on us, and understanding of just what held that fear in place, leaves a big effect to such a degree, that we have great empathy for others who we now see in that same circumstance. We learn much by it.

Basically we feel a wrong within us each time we become fearful of doing something, or we only do those things because we know no other way. Whenever we step through that fear, or give to another, we feel that warm, open feeling of love because we have chosen that path. It is the universe just as it was designed. Whatever we put out there comes back in kind so that we do understand where we are at as we learn, realize and understand that journey to the unconditional love that is everywhere. Just waiting for us to understand good and bad, drop our walls of protection and release those fears we build, for we have known no other way.

Be that change. Begin to step towards that warm, open feeling within your life and watch it begin to change your circumstances. Don’t put any expectations on it, just be what you know within IS your truth and coming from that place within. It may seem difficult at first, but next time you become involved in an awkward situation, do not react, breeeathe…and show the other person there is another way, another outcome that is beneficial to all. And from that love within you, you are helping them on their journey, and yourself, starting a new learning experience, and creating within them a new path to that love that we all so dearly wish to reach within.

The following is something that I always have in my healing room. I must apologize as I do not know its origins, but its wisdom is priceless.

—————————————–
TWO WOLVES

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said,

‘My son, the battle is between two ‘wolves’ inside us all.
One is evil. It is anger, envy, regret, jealousy, sorrow, greed, arrogance, self pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.
The other one is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, empathy, benevolence, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.’

The grandson thought about it for a minute then asked his grandfather,

‘Which wolf wins?’

The old Cherokee simply replied,

‘The one you feed’.

—————————————–

Namaste

Monday Meeting — Anything For Love

The love of true friends!

Soul Gatherings

In February 2014, one of Gerdi McKenna’s friends wrote an e-mail requesting a photoshoot for all her friends, as she had been diagnosed with breast cancer a few months before. Here is what happened among the friends at the photoshoot:

Video Credit: Albert Bredenhann, YouTube
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Finding the Beauty Within!

My previous post that I reblogged from :

Endless Light and Love!

And click on this link for that post below:

Indigo Children, They are So Switched On to Life

was such an amazing thing to watch and feel, especially where it came from. (See this video first so that you may understand the rest of this post).

It was spoken straight from his heart with not a trace of this world to begin his doubt, fears and the journey back to that unconditional love. We can sense it from him, but this world, and the fears we have created within ourselves, block it in us for fear of being open to it, and being hurt. Just as his mum was eventually brought to tears because of what she felt in the truth that he spoke.

Our minds and ego’s have had years of blocking things to protect ourselves from those painful things in our lives, but the truth is, it is when we do face those fears, we are free. It is by doing that, that we are loving ourselves, and that duality we have had for so, so long, is finally let go, and we begin to truly love and accept ourselves by seeing ourselves for who we truly are, instead of convincing ourselves we are this or that because of those fears.

That truth when we finally see within ourselves, without the walls of fear, anger or pain, is so enlightening. You finally see the beauty all around for you are no longer on guard, no longer afraid of what may come next. You begin to feel all around you in truth, as it comes, instead of what you think may be there through fear, and prepare for the worst which does not allow you to feel everything as it is, because you are so concerned with the next ‘what if?’.

You begin to see and feel in such a way that you begin to smile at all those little things that you just didn’t have time for before, and now can be seen for what they really are, part of the beauty of life. You are no longer set in your ways to be ready for anything, you just appreciate what happens as it does for you are now beginning to realise that this journey, is a journey, and not a work routine.

You begin to live by ‘looking out the window’ of your holiday transport and relax and enjoy the views and the experiences of what is a beautiful, natural landscape that can be truly experienced for the wonder that they are.

I will make one other small comment here. For those that know, it has already been seen, but for others on their journey it is in the recognition of the power, and I’m not talking about worldly power where you have control in some way over another, it is the power that is given ‘unconditionally’ from within the child. When you recognise, without fear, where it has come from, then you have begun to answer your truth within and realise the potential of giving from your heart and understanding the journey of unconditional love. The power that the child has is simply the fact that he does not yet condemn himself for anything, view himself wrong in any way or have judgement of another. All is given from a place within that only knows that unconditional love.

You too can be that child within. May your journey and awareness, from your courage to look within and release those walls that you have built, blossom from the love that you give yourself to remove those fears. For in that knowledge and acceptance you then find that you are very perfect exactly as you are, and the understanding of unconditional love begins.

Namaste

Reach Out!

Reach out, reach out, I will always be your friend,

always in my heart, a strength I will send,

don’t let those fears, be your lonely guide,

don’t let your heart, be burnt away inside,

don’t ever think, the things that you feel,

are not so important, they are not so very real,

when it comes too much, and everything a task,

you hide it deep inside, always wearing a mask,

the days become a struggle, it’s hard to keep at bay,

to take another breath, one more time in the fray,

but here my beautiful friend, let me give a plea to you,

I love you even more, if you ask to help you through,

I see your every turn, that black dog is lurking deep,

testing every part of you, the climbs are very steep,

I see your silent agony, please just call out my name,

you mean so very much to me, to watch you in such pain,

I know it’s so lonely, not wanting us to know,

but please believe me, it is my love I want to show,

I know it isn’t easy, as many a test will be,

but as your friend in battle, I’m here till your free,

reach out, reach out, I’ll always help you through,

with all the love within, I always give this to you.

Many of our family and friends, or even strangers that we know suffer in silence with depression and such emotional turmoil in their lives that we are unaware just how deep this is. I wrote this for those people to show that they can ‘reach out’ and let us know how they feel, how it is effecting their lives, and know that we will care very much for they are a part of who we are. They mean so much to us, and any suffering for them should never be silent, because their silence is our silence. Ask, someone who understands will be listening!

And for anyone who does not have anyone to talk to, please go to these sites below, they are for anyone who feel they have depression or for friends and family who do not understand it or how to be able to help anyone deal with it. Please…reach out! Namaste

www.blackdoginstitute.org.au

www.beyondblue.org.au

A Path!

So far, after a great deal of time of my life, I am seeing the underneath fabric of all that connects us, and really understanding some depth into the journey and its purpose. Not all, obviously, but with much better perspective of something that I thought I knew from earlier in my life (for where I was at), but really did not. I suppose it is like using Tarot cards, they look like cards with pictures and writing on them, but after a while they begin to tell a story.

This journey we are on always follows the theme of the heart. One of struggling with a myriad of emotions that always come back to that one truth of unconditional love. But that understanding can only come after many, many paths that test us in so many ways. We at times wish it would all end, but in hindsight, begin to see the wisdom of the journey and how it has slowly changed us in such a way that we begin to see the beauty in our understanding of just what is really going on underneath it all.

When I first began to ‘see’, I thought I had cracked the secret of the universe and went out to heal the world, which (in hindsight) was exactly what I needed to do as I was drawing people to me that needed healing from that perspective. But as I understand more and as I have ‘opened’ more, I realise that in reality, I need to do less. Then I only attract to me from that perspective.

This journey we are on is set up so perfectly to attract exactly what we need within our lives to such a degree that it astounds me with the beauty of it. I can be helping someone, and as we go through the particular emotional turmoil they are experiencing, I begin to see exactly why they go through this experience, from whatever fear they are experiencing, to attracting exactly what is required for them to go through and release that fear allowing them to experience, understand, release the emotions and gain the wisdom from this path.

And all of this wisdom begins to show the truth within, the journey of understanding and the knowledge that we are all here to gain the beauty of unconditional love. The releasing of all of our fears is the main agenda for it blocks our ability to ‘see’. We put up our physical and emotional walls to protect ourselves from those fears but in so doing we are so focused on creating a life to avoid those fears that it closes the ability to ‘see’.

These emotional walls are very important as they cause us to struggle within with so many onslaughts of ‘what if ‘ and ‘should I or shouldn’t I’, that becomes a hard taskmaster but in truth creates a master within. Like a chess game. In the beginning you see lots of pieces that do many individual things and your focus is in close on each piece for what they do, but after a while you can begin to see that these same pieces can in fact be looked at from further back and moved in context with the other pieces. Your understanding of the strategy of the game becomes more complex but easier because of that understanding. You gain wisdom by experiencing the game and understanding it’s complexities.

So is life. As you begin to understand the way that you react to certain circumstances and understand that those fears are in fact ruling your life and complicating you beyond measure, and you reach a point within that says ‘enough’, you begin to step out of a strategy that you have had in place forever to cope with this fear, and begin to try another strategy, and another, until you realise that none of them work. There is only one way…and that is to go through that fear, face it head on, and then and only then do you understand why you have had that coping strategy in place, to protect you from it because you have been afraid to face it. But it was never going anywhere, it was just sitting there until you do face it.

So you begin to look deeper to understand why this has been in place for so long. You poke and prod in frustration until one day you see or hear something that you relate to, and suddenly you understand what it is that you have been afraid of. At this point you usually burst into tears from the release of understanding. The final checkmate that finishes such a long and drawn out process that the relief is indescribable. It’s done. Leaving you very drained, tired but out from under a burden that you have laboured under forever. There will be a lot of time needed to get over this as it is a hugely emotional drain, and unlike a physical drain, this needs much more recovery time.

After this journey is complete you begin to see this same path that others are taking and you have much empathy to those others because of what you have experienced. You begin to give to others from that compassion within that you have gained from your experience. And this opens you from within, as your journey has now shown you your truth. You are no longer hiding, evading or even lying to yourself because of that fear. You are no longer bound by the walls that you had in place for protection. You begin to give from your truth and in doing that the universe responds in kind, to begin another journey, but with this one it is from the opposite side of the coin. This time you start to understand the journey and give from that place of understanding.

As time goes on and you ‘see’ so much more, you begin to master your wisdom and realise that all that went before has purpose. It also enables you to ‘step back’ further and begin to really understand just what unconditional love means. You are no longer judgemental as you can now see we all have our own individual fears and are driven by those fears. And what a fear means to one person may not affect another at all. This in itself releases you for the simple reason that those judgements are based on fear. You no longer have yours as you have now released it, and you are now coming from your truth within, which is totally free from any judgement and no longer a load to carry around.

You now understand the complexities of what a fear can do. It has always been the reason from doing or not doing so many things. It integrates itself into your life, not just a side of your life but an integration of just who you are. That is why it is such a release when it is faced and released. It will feel like the world has been lifted off your shoulders. And it is no longer at the steering wheel of your life. You now give control back to yourself, your true self that has been behind the wall.

So now as each piece of understanding is gained you begin to ‘see’ further and further into your truth, of just what you are and the meaning that we have so been looking for all our lives. To realise that this whole journey has been only about one thing, even though there is a billion ways to get there, and that is to understand the path of self love, to find that truth within, remove that duality and finally become one with all that is, the beauty and perfection that is unconditional love.

With love and light,

Mark

A ‘Shift’ from an Out of Body Experience!

After my previous post (Truth from an unexpected place!), with regard to a gentleman who had an Out of Body Experience (O.B.E.), I had a conversation with a friend (yes, Tammy), who suggested I should put MY experience into a post so that others may gain from the experience. Now my experience was quite different. Yes, it was an O.B.E. but not what you would call ‘in the classic sense’ of one where you are usually floating above your body and looking down on it and your surroundings. Mind you, others may have experienced what I did, I just haven’t come across one yet and have no idea what to call it. Let’s just say it was a ‘Shift’ for want of a better description.

It was in my early days of ‘spirituality’ and trying to find me. I was doing the meditations and had begun my Massage Therapy Course so I was just touching base with what I wanted to become, and reading books from all over the place to learn and explore other experience’s so that I may understand what it all meant. I suppose spirit knew I was ready for something that, even to this day, still gives me such a feeling of awe and majesty in just what is ‘there’ for us to be a part of.

A young lady (I’ll call her Sue), had joined the meditation group and after getting to know her over a few weeks we would spend some time going for walks and speaking about our journeys and what we had got from the meditations and just swapped information that we had learned from them. In the short time that I had known her she seemed a lovely young lady, knew her mind and the direction she wanted out of life. She also had what appeared to be a ‘depression’ that she was dealing with because of a breakdown in her relationship and was on some medication to help her through this time.

Now, over the course of those few weeks I did note that occasionally Sue would become quite angry and unhappy with the circumstances that she found herself in, and I would talk with her to help her understand and deal with her emotions and try to resolve how she was feeling. By the end of those weeks I saw that she was becoming quite agitated, and under the circumstances I thought I understood her emotional journey.

It was then that a friend told me that they thought that she had a Bipolar disorder, and she had gone off her medication. Well,  the only thing I knew about it was that it was a condition where your moods would alternate between being agitated and or elevated and that it wasn’t a very nice thing to have and it was a difficult thing to deal with at the best of times. And as time had gone past I was witnessing a deterioration within herself and how she coped with her day to day life and interacted with the people around her.

One afternoon we were having a discussion on the balcony of the place I was living in and Sue began a discourse on what she thought was the real problems that affected the world and her proposals to repair and heal the unfairness that was rife in the running of it. As the afternoon went on she started to really escalate and become angrier and angrier, and speaking more in terms that were becoming quite unrealistic, finally reaching a tearful stage into what I was now beginning to realise was a manic episode that is associated with this condition. I realised then how so unfair this condition was, the obvious pressure this had applied to her marriage and the current circumstances that she now found herself in. And all the while not being able to control it except for the medication that she had now stopped taking. My heart could feel her totally (and this ‘event’ showed me just how empathic I had become). I could feel her fear, her sorrow, her pain and the utter hopelessness she felt of the situation, and my whole being went out to her and just ‘gave from the heart’ all in an instant. It was an incredible feeling, an outpouring of pure love.

And then suddenly everything changed. And I mean everything. I was not sitting on my lounge looking out onto the balcony where she was sitting. I could not actually feel my ‘physicality’ on the lounge or in regard to anything around me. But the overriding thing about ‘me’ was that I now ‘knew’ everything. I did not have to ask, it was ‘just’ there, everything, all. Everything ‘was’ me. And there was ‘no time’. It did not exist. Time did not belong where I ‘was’. Everything was at my behest. But I did not need to even ‘want’ anything. There was no need or requirement or thought that I required anything. It was a total perfection as it was. It was the most all encompassing and total feeling of ‘I am’. I can barely describe it to give it any justice. In this place I was a total of everything that ever was, will be, all at once. I could see all around me but there was no need to ‘look’ at anything because I already knew it. But even so, all that I could ‘see’ was an olive green color. I never questioned it at the time because there was no need, but I think in hindsight that it was because of what I had become, that was the only way I could ‘view’ anything was because I was ‘seeing’ things through my senses, not my actual eyes.

My awareness had been raised to such an incredible level. I, with my brain and thought patterns, can barely grasp it now. It was the most all encompassing totality of everything. But this much I do know. I was given the most barest touch of what WAS actually there. I knew I didn’t have the ‘senses’ to understand the depth and vista of what actually was there. My mind would not have been able to absorb what incredible information was around me and I would have gone over the edge. I was being shown something so magnificent so that I could give from a place of understanding in what I now knew. It was the beginning of my connection within of my ‘knowing’ and bringing that understanding into my healing for myself and others. It was also a very important part of my truth, so that in feeling that I could give from that place.

And then I came back to sitting on the lounge, facing out to the balcony. Only this time Sue was walking back through the doorway saying that she was going home. I had no idea how long I was there. There was no way of understanding if it was 1 second, 100 or even an hour. It felt like it was but an instant, but it didn’t matter. But the one thing that I did know was I was as high as a kite. I was floating and feeling so light that whatever I touched was not registering properly. My perception of everything around me was totally out of synch. I could barely move to start with as it felt like my first time in a body. I was all over the place and didn’t dare try to get up or walk. I felt that I maybe I had projected myself or astral travelled for the first time and because I hadn’t done this before, it was taking a bit to get used to, to settle back into my body.

I was so relaxed and in such a state of peace that I deliberately let myself go back into what I had just felt and slowly went back over all that had happened. Absorbed this incredibly wonderful place so that I could savour it forever. Finally my awareness was bringing me back and I was balancing back into my body, so I slowly got up and ‘tried’ to walk and all those other things that a normal body takes for granted. It took quite some time (hours), to just walk properly. It felt like I’d been in traction for months and was taking my first steps. It wasn’t until then that I even registered that Sue had actually left.

After a good nights sleep (and believe me I crashed), I slowly got up, and yes, I was still quite out of sorts. My actions were quite slow and deliberate and I also found my state of mind was still in that ‘high’ of the day before. This went on for the next two weeks. The body slowly got back to working at nearly my normal pace, but the mind wasn’t going there. I realised I needed to ground myself or I couldn’t function properly.

I went to a friend who is a Reiki Master and told her the story and asked if she could bring me back and ground me so that I could bring what I had learned down into the ‘now’. It worked quite well and I could function much better after it, but I did realise that regardless of what I did, it had changed me forever, and I needed to begin my journey of what changes the ‘event’ had now created within me.

I now understand and realise that this ‘event’ was a forerunner to my path of spiritual healing and the understanding of bringing the ‘love within’ back into my day to day life. The healing of the heart within is just as much a spiritual as well as a physical healing of us in this world that we live in. It has it’s trials and tribulations so that we may understand our journey, but it is in the end, where many do not understand, that it is in loving ourselves that we are able to heal and finally create that beautiful place within, that unconditional love that no longer fears this world, and then begins to give from that place within.

With Love, Light and Blessings,

Mark

Truth from an unexpected place!

I did it again. Pre-empting a night of ho-hum with my 83 year old mum out celebrating an early Christmas dinner with all her tennis chums, I assumed a night of conversation that would consist of the latest thrashing such and such gave to someone else, and how they got them in the final set would be the highlight of the night. Little did I know that the foreign gentleman across the table from me was going to fire a rocket across my bow and make me sit up and really take note of a truth from an unexpected quarter.

A general polite conversation had begun about the use of statin’s as a cholesterol lowering drug and the uproar that had hit Australian television a couple of weeks ago after a very respectable scientific show called Catalyst (Part 1: Heart of the matter, Dietary Villian’s, Part 2: Heart of the matter, Cholesterol Drug War), had done some serious research to show that the cholesterol came after heart disease, not before it. And the research that had determined that cholesterol was the culprit, was seriously flawed. As you could imagine that caused a sensation that is still reverberating around the country now. (By the way, I am not suggesting throwing your statin’s out the door, speak with your Doctor first, then do what I did and flushed the con job that they are down the toilet).

Anyway, this, believe it or not, wasn’t what threw me. The gentleman with the smile and twinkle in his eye quietly let the hubbub die down and he proceeded to tell us of his heart condition that he was going through at that moment. They had inserted a stent to try to repair the vein to the heart and reduce the strain on the heart wall muscle that, he had been told, the statin’s appear to have weakened. That went well, but his heart condition still left him quite weak. They also said that in his weakened condition they would not be able to operate again because he would not survive it. And he was still smiling.

A lady next to me said it must have been a terrible ordeal, to which he thought about for a moment and then said ‘Yes, it was. But while I was hovering above the surgeon watching him operate on me, it really didn’t matter, I couldn’t feel anything’. You could have dropped a pin, in the middle of a restaurant seating 150 people, and heard it roll over the floor. We all sat there stunned, myself included, by this admission from someone from the old school who usually kept those things to themselves. He went on to say it was peaceful and he could see exactly what they were wearing, what they were saying to each other and what everything looked like in the room. Even how they were doing the operation on him.

To say the least, he had all our attention. And finally spirit gave me a nudge (I was still sitting there in a daze), and gently got me to ask him, ‘after being a part of that, how do you feel towards life now?’. To which he replied, ‘everything has changed, things that were important, no longer are. Other things that didn’t seem to matter, now do. Life has changed’. (And where have I heard that before!). And as we all sat there nodding our heads and seeing the truth in his words, we all realised our lives were very artificial. Very keep up with the Jones’s. And full of stress for all the wrong reasons.

As I write this I even think that where I am coming from can still use a lot more changes. Changes in what I feel is important to me, and those things that I really don’t need. My attitude to a lot of things can still do with a lot of tweaking for the simple reason I still allow many things to come into them that in reality have no meaning. Yes, I need to learn those things but more to the point is in having the attitude of giving from a place that has meaning and truth. And I realise that I still have things that need to be expressed and let go to heal so that I can actually live the truth that I am, not the version that is giving, but with a layer of fear wrapped around my heart for protection so that my attitude is restricted by this layer getting in the way of everything.

So at the end of the evening, we could see that this gentleman was becoming quite tired, and even I was beginning to feel he was actually in quite a bit of pain, so with a little nod of his head to his wife they bid their good nights to one and all and made their way home.

I went out with the expectation of a dull evening, and spirit being spirit decided to show me what life was really all about. In the most unexpected place, from the most ordinary circumstances, life is alive and well. And from a place that seemed lifeless and coming to an end. He had a smile and a twinkle in his eye, and I know why. I now even feel that within myself because he was able to express his truth to us all. Life is what we make it. So what do you really want out of life? What really is important? This life is really but a brief sojourn, and in reality it is to those we love, ourselves included, that we should give from a place of truth and feel from our heart within. Too soon time has come and gone before we realise that maybe we should have done this or that. Now is the only time…forgive (for you may not be able to later), let go (for pain is the only thing you hold), hug (for it cares from within), say ‘I love you’ (for most of all, it means everything). Namaste

Namaste Princess!

After all that was shown to me in ‘The Love’, spirit decided that I needed to see something a bit further along this journey of unconditional love so that I may realise it’s significance over time in how it has affected me, my way of life and just how I project that out into the world.

It has been nearly two years after my relationship with the most beautiful women in the world has ended, even though we are still good friends. And in that time I have always given to that friendship, knowing that given time we would both eventually meet others and devote more time and energy into those relationships, to progress further on our journey of understanding of who we truly are.

So last night I visited my princess to give her a present for her birthday. And was met by this incredibly beautiful and regal queen. Recently, over a period of a couple of months, I felt a change within her in a way that was showing, after a few years of going through some seriously traumatic events, that that time of the princess was now over. The beauty of what those events had created was now beginning to emerge like the chrysalis of a butterfly. And it was a lovely thing to see.

We talked for some time and I could feel the energy coming from a totally different place. Her confidence in understanding what she had now become was amazing. She had found that lovely lady within, and was beginning to show that love to herself, after all that had gone before. Give to herself in a way that showed she had come through that trial by fire that is needed to create that rebirth within, and then come from that place to give truly from the heart.

Her heart was in her eyes, the happiness in her actions. She was blossoming in so many ways after her time of understanding, with those things that she had gone through. I was so happy for her after seeing the pain and the struggle that her life had put before her so that she could find that queen within. That searching and finding of that wisdom and belief in herself to become that hope for her future and what she wanted to become.

I’ll never forget that journey, as it was this princess that showed me the beauty of unconditional love. And I now realised, that was why spirit needed me to still be a part of this relationship, so that I could see that this was a gradual process like any other. We grow in faith in ourselves, we grow to understand anything we study, we grow in understanding in the raising of our children, we grow in our love for another, but the biggest and most incredible growth, is in loving ourselves. These things test us in so many ways, but in that final testing we slowly become that beautiful thing within that is unconditional love.

So after all that has been said and done, my love for this beautiful lady and all that she has taught me, is undiminished. My own heart journey has reached a new place of understanding and letting go. The woman I have loved and remained friends with has grown in her own voyage of discovery. Time for me to let the princess of yesterday blossom as queen of her own heart. Sometimes letting go is the only way to keep that which we love and those we have known. A new stage of the voyage begins. Friendship and love remain.

Love rejoices in another’s happiness. Always.

Namaste

This song is so poignant to my journey, it’s synchronicity in how I found it, was as always perfection from the universe.

50 Signs of spiritual Awakening

Found this while wandering the community. Very interesting list for anyone curious to their journey and just what an awakening can mean to them.

Indigo Visions

More art on my website: (www.annett-bank.co.uk)pastel drawings

  1. Ability to learn new concepts, or languages rapidly increases …this stems from opening to all your soul record and remembering who you are
  2. Making a conscious effort to connect to people through the eyes and the heart
  3. Increasing Gnosis (knowledge of spiritual mysteries)
  4. More frequent flashes of ‘inner-tuition’, or intuition
  5. Disconnection from the white noise and negative information (TV and radio)
  6. Seeking holistic health care practitioners as partners in your healing journey…no longer seeking a doctor to “fix you” with prescription drugs
  7. A feeling of being grounded to the core of the earth.
  8. Knowing that these places within your body are showing you about areas of great opportunity for growth on all levels.
  9. Paying attention to the places of pain/restriction  in your body in order to move into them!
  10. A sense of your own power to create with thought, words, and actions
  11. Activating…

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Moment of Truth!

Right, I’m going to stick my head out here. Yes, I’m only a new kid on the block but in my efforts to do the right thing and follow these ‘Awards’, and the appropriate etiquette so that I may fit into the community, I have inadvertently rocked everyone’s boat, including mine. Let me explain.  The entire purpose of these awards are to give to a range of people an award for, what we individually feel, are there beautiful points. Whether that is their expressions in writing, art, photography, spirituality, suffering, big hearts, great works or just giving for the pleasure of sharing. And let me be the first to hold my hand up and say, ‘This community is loaded with some amazing people’, and individually we find people that we find an interest in, and follow them and really like the space they are giving from.

So…along comes an award for those very reasons…someone finds me great (ahem, just let me comb my hair back a bit and adjust my tie 🙂 ), and I really do appreciate their thinking I’m worthwhile in some way and feel good that I am given this. Honestly, I do. So I follow the rules and fix up a post, get a list of my lovely people that I follow and think they are very deserving of this, and send them a comment so that they know of just how I feel about them. Smiling the whole time as I decide to save time and put out a similar comment to all parties. Thinking cap goes on and I ask myself, how should I put this together. I know, how do I actually feel about all these differing people and their sites I go to and follow. And so I put together the following:

Hi, I have found your site to be an amazing place and have appreciated it for what it has given me as an enjoyable, learning and heartfelt place. For that I would like to present you with the Versatile Bloggers Award. To accept this award please click on my link in this comment and go to the Awards post on the Home page. At the bottom of the post it will give you instructions on how to accept the award. I have checked to make sure you did not have instructions that you were no longer accepting awards but if I have missed this please accept my apologies. Otherwise thank you again for the sharing of your site, I follow it as I like and relate to the gift of your writing very much. Namaste

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Reality check:

1. The Bold and Italic parts were my truth, the plain central part was where I began to feel my truth go gurgling down the drain like a ‘car salesman or politician’. (My apologies to any of those that are honest people). But MY blog (and who I am), is all about being my ‘truth’ and all this did was make me feel uncomfortable about what I was doing, even though I was giving it for very good reasons, it still felt that I was giving it falsely because the rules say I must get 10 or 15 people to give the award to (and being a new comer I only had 20 at that point), which again made me feel I was being forced to find enough to cover the rules instead of just giving because I actually did feel these people were deserving of an award. And I do feel that all the people I follow are special, I just haven’t had time to ‘get to know them’ to reinforce those feelings. I also suppose I felt uncomfortable about what I was then ‘lumbering’ onto them. I had just made a lot of friends and I was possibly now putting a dampener on that friendship.

2. This comment was received very politely by all involved who replied very courteously (Thank you everyone). Though, in the time I have been here, looking around and getting feedback from comments and replies around the community as a whole, there was this feeling of ‘oh poop’ when an award was received.

3. Upon researching ‘oh poop’, I came to realise that these awards are given, for all intents and purposes, with all the truthful intentions of awarding someone with something that has meaning and really does reflect what one person thinks of another. BUT, after doing one myself I now realise that they are also time consuming, done hesitatingly because we do not wish to ‘lumber’ it on good friends, and lastly because of the first two reasons they no longer have the appeal they once did because of that.

4. There is nothing wrong with the presentation in itself, as it is most happily accepted for why it was given, but it brings about the extremes of feeling happy, then frustration because of what it will then entail for the recipient. This is only engendering a feeling of distaste towards something that should be the exact opposite. A lot of people will find it ‘great’ and follow the instructions accordingly, but that can and does become a little testing to say the least after the 10th award (not referring to anyone in particular, but man, is she good at her computer now  🙂  And I did love & appreciate ALL the time and effort she had put into the award that she gave me, thank you Tammy!), and so, out of courtesy we grin and bear it because we feel we must because of how we feel about ‘our’ community.

5. Some of these awards have no doubt been created and brought about because of some incredibly amazing creation or works by someone or even in memory of someone that was highly thought of. Or even as a way for ‘beginners’ to put themselves out there for the community to see. But the whole idea of that is so it can be an award that WILL remind us of that circumstance or person for all the right reasons. Not for a feeling of ‘oh shoot, not another one’.

So at this point I’m wondering if the whole awards thing should be given a rethink or be redesigned in such a way that it does give it’s meaning back, and a reason to be looked at again with a pride and pleasure for what it can really mean to an individual and not another blip on your blog.

Let’s say a regular voting, once every three months (I’m only tossing numbers around here), at a site that is set up for just that purpose…academyblog.wordpress.com…(hopefully it’s not been taken), or some such that allows for anyone to nominate a blog that they feel is worthwhile. Multiple categories to cover the amazing talent that is in this beautiful community. Tally the numbers up and really present them with something that they will treasure forever. Just think of the after parties  🙂  Also I’m sure there is some incredible talent out there who could create other awards or something to be remembered (with their name and reference to their blog) for their efforts of course. Actually I feel a competition coming on to find the ‘best’ award designs for the different categories.

Ok, I’ve stuck my nose out there because I feel it is a truth that is being politely ignored. If I’m in the wrong then I give my full and total apologies to all concerned in the community. But in what I have felt and seen so far there are way too many feeling uncomfortable with the process and rather than leave it that way, I think it should be updated, and give it back its credence so that it will be given the respect and courtesy it deserves.

May your academy award be heartfelt, loved and show the truth of who you really are within.

Love and light,

Mark

P.S. The above is just a suggestion, maybe it is needed to start the site up, to allow suggestions to be put forward FROM the community so that what is created is actually what the community wants.

P.S.S. No, thank you, setting up an academy is not my forte, I just do truth 🙂

P.S.S.S. Yes, I suppose I could do what others do and politely say thank you for the award, and then not do the process because it has become uncomfortable. (And that isn’t what any of the people I gave the award to did, it just seemed to be a consensus among the many comments and replies that I have come across in the community).